I Saw the Standing Ovation Before It Happened

My TEDx Begins…

Why do some people run toward challenge… while others spend their entire lives avoiding it?

I spent two years trying to answer that question…

From everything I’d experienced in my life, I thought I understood the deeper meaning of the word challenge.

I’d built a successful real estate business. Navigated good markets and down markets.

I’d written six books.

I’d started a company during a recession.

I’d survived cancer.

I thought I knew what it meant to overcome difficult things.

I didn’t.

On December 13th, 2023, I was sitting at a beach club in St. Barth with my husband Adam, our son Chase, and our daughter Bianca — and I realized I didn’t understand the word challenge at all.

We were having one of those perfect family days.

Lunch. Laughter. Rosé. Dominoes.

The kind of day you wish you could freeze forever.

Then my son casually said,

“I’m leaving in January for OCS.”

I asked, “What’s OCS?”

“Officer Candidate School.”

“Okay… what’s that?”

“The Marines.”

My chin dropped. The joy drained out of me.

You see — when I found out I was having a boy, my second child, I had two fears. Circumcision… and the draft.

I know that sounds dramatic. But I’m a Sicilian mother. We worry professionally.

I survived the first one. The second fear stayed with me for decades.

And now, sitting on a beach in paradise, it felt like that fear had suddenly come to life.

Trying to stay supportive, I asked, “Why?”

His answer was only five words. Five words that changed my life forever.

“I want to challenge myself.”

As I pondered his words, I just couldn’t understand why anyone would willingly leave comfort for uncertainty.

When I thought about Marines, Navy SEALs, Special Forces — I didn’t think of ordinary people. I thought of superheroes. People built differently than the rest of us.

And yet somehow my son wanted to become one of them.

I was terrified. But I was also fascinated.

Why would someone willingly choose challenge? Why do some people run toward it while others spend their lives avoiding it?

That question stayed with me.

When we got back to the villa, Adam and I spent hours watching military training videos, documentaries, interviews — trying to understand the world our son was stepping into.

But somewhere in that process, another question emerged.

What if ordinary people are capable of far more than they think?

As I dug deeper, I found the same answer echoing across completely different fields.

Psychologists have a name for it — the stretch zone. The space just beyond comfort, where we grow the most.

And decades of research on mindset reached the same conclusion: people who see challenge as opportunity are more resilient — and more likely to succeed.

Different fields. Same truth.

Growth isn’t something that happens to us.

It’s something we choose.

The Challenge I Chose

On December 31st, I walked out my front door… and started running.

I wasn’t a runner. I was almost sixty years old. I wasn’t training for a race. I simply knew I needed to move. I needed to process.

Because those five words kept repeating…

“I want to challenge myself.”

As the weeks passed, I started saying yes to things that tested me.

A Spartan Race.

A half-marathon trail run.

Several 10Ks.

Then — in true Debbi fashion — about six weeks into my running career, I signed up for the Los Angeles Marathon.

Not the half. The full. Twenty-six point two miles.

My original goal had been to run a half-marathon by my 60th birthday, in July. But I decided to accelerate the goal — and double it.

Now, most people would have focused on training their body.

I became obsessed with training my mind.

Every day I immersed myself in stories of resilience. Then I stumbled onto David Goggins’ book, Can’t Hurt Me. And it completely changed my perspective.

When Goggins described the obstacles he had endured, I realized something.

I wasn’t being asked to survive what he survived. I wasn’t putting my life on the line.

I had simply chosen to run a marathon.

The marathon didn’t suddenly become easier. But my perspective had changed.

The Mindset In Motion™ Method

And that aha moment became the foundation of what I now call the Mindset In Motion™ Method.

Five simple steps.

Goal. Believe. Internalize. Share. Activate.

Goal.

Define your goal. Make it crystal clear. Mine was simple. Cross the finish line.

Believe.

I didn’t know exactly how I would do it. But I believed I would.

Internalize.

Long before marathon day, I mentally rehearsed success. I imagined crossing that finish line — the emotion, the exhaustion, the victory.

And this isn’t just positive thinking. Neuroscientists have found that when we vividly imagine ourselves succeeding, the brain begins rehearsing the experience before it actually happens.

By race day, I had crossed that finish line — in my mind — hundreds of times.

Share.

Not every dream should be shared with everyone. Some people will unknowingly hand you their fears and their limitations.

Share your goals with people who strengthen belief — not weaken it.

And finally…

Activate.

This is where most dreams die. Because activation requires movement before certainty. Action before confidence. Progress before proof.

Mile 18

Then marathon day arrived.

Thousands of runners gathered at the start line. The gun went off. And everything I had visualized became reality.

At mile 12, I thought I’d injured my ankle. I called my husband and asked him to meet me with an ankle brace.

At mile 13, there he was — on Sunset Boulevard — waiting like a Formula One pit crew.

He handed me the brace. I carried it for the remaining 13 miles.

I never used it.

Sometimes we don’t actually need saving. We simply need support.

Then mile 18 happened.

Experienced marathon runners know all about mile eighteen. I didn’t.

That’s when your body and your mind begin negotiating.

The voice appears.

“You’ve done enough.”

“You can stop now.”

“No one will blame you.”

And that’s when it occurred to me.

Mindset isn’t motivational.

Mindset is instructional.

The words we repeat internally become commands.

So instead of saying “I can’t do this,” I changed the conversation.

“You always finish what you begin.”

“You will complete this race.”

“No is not an option.”

Then I reframed everything. I stopped running for myself. I started running for all those who are unable to run.

And gratitude became my fuel.

Hours later… I crossed the finish line.

Tears streamed down my face. Not because I had conquered a marathon.

Because I had conquered a limitation.

Challenge Is a Teacher

And that’s when I finally understood what my son had given me.

His five words were never about the Marines. They were about possibility.

Ever since that day, I have intentionally challenged myself.

Two years ago, I completed the Los Angeles Marathon.

Today, at 62 — whether it’s my next marathon or the next chapter of my life — I’ll keep choosing challenge.

Because challenge isn’t a test.

It’s a teacher.

It doesn’t simply reveal who we are. It reveals who we’re becoming.

The people we admire aren’t extraordinary. They’re ordinary people who choose challenge over comfort, growth over fear, and keep moving forward.

So I’ll leave you with one question.

What challenge have you been postponing — not because you can’t do it, but because you haven’t decided to?

Because the distance between who you are today and who you could become isn’t measured by talent.

It’s measured by your willingness to activate.

One goal. One decision. One uncomfortable step at a time.

Sometimes, all it takes are five words:

“I want to challenge myself.”

Thank you.

And Then Something Happened That I Had Already Seen in My Mind

When I was invited to speak at TEDx, I never imagined what would happen at the end of my talk.

I was honored, grateful, and genuinely surprised to receive a standing ovation.

Afterward, Sabelo, one of the organizers, walked over to me with a look I’ll never forget. He smiled and said, “I’ve never seen that before. You received a standing ovation.”

Ironically, I missed most of it.

As soon as I finished speaking, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief, exhilaration, and gratitude. I simply walked off the stage.

I had never spoken on a stage like that before and wasn’t sure what the proper etiquette was. I didn’t want to overstay my welcome or assume I should remain on stage, so I quietly exited.

A few days later, after three long flights across multiple time zones, I found myself replaying the entire experience in my mind — not just the talk itself, but everything that led up to it.

That’s when something remarkable occurred to me.

Without consciously thinking about it, I had followed the 5-Step Mindset In Motion™ Method that I describe in my book.

But it was Step 3 — Internalize — that suddenly became crystal clear.

I Had Rehearsed This Moment Before It Happened

For weeks leading up to TEDx, I had repeatedly pictured myself standing confidently on that stage.

I visualized delivering my talk successfully.

I imagined the audience connecting with the message, enjoying it, and, incredibly, I even imagined them rising to their feet in a standing ovation.

And then… it happened.

It’s still difficult for me to explain. Some might call it visualization. Others might call it neuroscience.

Whatever the explanation, I experienced firsthand the extraordinary connection between what we repeatedly rehearse in our minds and what we can ultimately achieve.

I remain overwhelmed with joy, gratitude, and humility — not because of the standing ovation itself, but because it reinforced something I have believed for years:

Our minds are far more powerful than we often give them credit for.

Sometimes, what we dare to see before it happens becomes the very thing that makes it possible.